Lubricants For The Modern Woman

We all need lube at some time or the other, but, “when?” I hear you say. “Will my man think I am frigid or something?” Natural lubricant is produced from glands that surround the vagina. They secrete pretty much all the time to make sure everything is nice and clean and lubricated when we walk and move about generally. Normally it is clear or slightly cloudy and has very little smell. It's viscosity (or stickiness) changes over a menstrual cycle and that is quite normal.If we have a problem down under, the lubrication we make may smell a bit and we would need to sort it out. The cause can be eating too much curry (not a joke - our secretions are influenced by what we eat). So if you want to taste good down under - eat plenty of fruit and vegetables and avoid strong smelling food! On the other hand, candida, a yeast infection in the intestine, can affect us with thrush. This condition can cause changes in secretion of our lubricants. Cystitis, a urine infection, can also make it all pretty unpleasant, not to mention sore. Sexually transmitted infections (STIs) can also cause our secretions to change. So if anything is amiss we need to go to the doctor to get it sorted, and quickly!Being nice and lubricated is all well and good, but what happens when we want to have sex or are being aroused? Naturally the body sends messages to the brain to produce more lubrication depending on the state of arousal. If our man is straight in there "no questions asked and over quickly", our brain isn't getting into first gear! We are just getting started and it is all over for him. We NEED time; exploration, touching, and plenty of massage with those fingers before our juices start flowing. The clitoris, a gland at the top of the opening to the vagina, needs to be stimulated in order for us to be aroused. Statistics have proved that nearly 90% of ladies out there do NOT come with penetration alone. With a mere 20 minutes of foreplay, 90% will come with penetration. Pretty amazing don't you think?In an ideal world, this is fine, but can we ladies always depend upon being able to secrete lubricants as required? Apparently, almost 60% of women do not have enough lubrication at some point in their lives. Either their partners are not doing the business or they simply do not have enough juices to get them flowing. On these occasions, there are plenty of lubes on the market:* Ones that look and feel like the real thing* Ones that are clear and tasteless* Ones that taste of strawberry, wine, grape, blueberry - all great for oral sex* Ones that have been round forever, like KY* New warming ones made of silicone* Ones especially developed for #%$@ sexBut most importantly all of us women have to accept that lube may have to be used at some time or other. If you feel a little dry and use a lube during sex - the slip and slide really adds to the pleasure. If you are using a toy (with or with out your partner) you will need the extra lubrication for added comfort to come quicker and to avoid bruising the delicate areas in and around the vagina.Equally, there are periods in our life where proprietary lubricants can give real benefits:* During the menstrual cycle* Undergoing stress* Going through the menopauseThese are all times when we are dryer than others, nothing to do with arousal – we simply need lubricants!Of course there are treatment and physical conditions that limit our ability to produce enough secretions. After chemotherapy or radiotherapy, while taking drugs (whether recreational or prescribed), or just because we are out of sorts.So the moral is ladies: enjoy good sex ~ enjoy lubricated sex!

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April Lightwood is a professional sex therapist with over ten years experience. She is currently working with Theatons Sex Toys.

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